waiting on the world to change.

right now, this very moment (which will, of course, change before i post this) i am 36 minutes from 28. nitpicky, i know. i always get a tiny bit (ok, a lot) nostalgic on my birthday. i was thinking back today while i drove on I-71 about birthdays gone by. something interesting usually happens on my bday, and there are a few in particular that stand out. here's a recap:

1981 - I am born. nothing unusual except that i almost kill my mother in the process.

1985 - my parents divorce is finalized the day before my birthday. happy 4th birthday to me.

1986 - skippy manages to wreck her car about 1 hour prior to my 5th birthday party. my great-grandmother ends up entertaining 5 5-year olds until skip makes it home. grandma is not thrilled. i am.

1989 - i turn 8. i have pneumonia. as in missed 2 entire weeks of school pneumonia. awesome.

1991 - skip manages to fall ill with chronic fatigue syndrome the week prior to my birthday. i participate in a car wash the morning of my 10th birthday (a saturday). i have my party at the roller skating rink.

1994 - i turn 13. i celebrate my first birthday with a broken leg. this will not be my last birthday with a broken leg.

1997 - an exchange student arrives at our house two nights before my bday. i turn 16 on a sunday. i celebrate by going on a bike ride because i am too chicken sh!t to get my driver's license.

1999 - i sprain my ankle in what can only be described as a dancing with the stars type leap in the hallway of my dorm. i go to the emergency room, where they actually call my parents and make them drive 70 miles before they can treat me because i am not yet 18 (this was at about 2 am on the day before the bday).

2001 - i go to dinner with el nene. i get a phone call from my father and spend the rest of the night in the hospital because he thinks my stepmother is going into labor. the next day, i play driver to a bunch of college freshmen on a field trip. i am henceforth christened mrs. robinson. oh, and i turn 20.

2002 - i turn 21. i celebrate by having a hotel party where, miraculously, no one gets hurt.

2003 - i turn 22 while living in boston. i celebrate by driving to maine. miraculously again, no one is injured in said trip.

2006 - i turn 25. we celebrate with a trip to canada, which sounds exotic but is really only about an hour from where i live in michigan. this is also my first trip to a casino. i lose $40 to a penny slot machine called the dam beaver lumberjacks. not kidding.

2008 - i turn 27. this is the year i graduate from law school. this is also the birthday i spend hopped up on painkillers, as i have recently made a tumble down an entire flight of stairs. this marks the third time i have spent my birthday in some kind of cast on my leg.

2009 - TBA.

that's it for the trip down memory lane. now for a brief schmoltzfest.

as with many of my more recent birthdays, i have spent the time leading up to 28 reminiscing in a melancholy sort of way. and, being who i am, i have to share this with the blogosphere at large. granted, my blogosphere consists of about 8 people...but still. i'm sharing. to begin with, i am quite unsure as to how i arrived at 28 without noticing. i had big plans for myself by this age - i mean BIG. many of those plans have not been achieved thusfar...but i have to say, i have done a lot of things in my life that i am pretty damn proud of. i graduated from high school, college, law school. i went and lived for a time in another country, and managed to do so with relatively little incident. i have people in my life who love me, unconditionally, without asking too many questions. they are patient with all of my issues, my hangups, my idiosyncracies. god, i hope i spelled that right. i guess where i am going with this is that i am so goddamngrateful to be alive that i don't know how to handle it. there are many things in my life that i would like to see change, but nothing i can't live with (or without). the past 27 years have taught me to enjoy who i am, where i am, and the company that i have on this wild ride - and these people, for the most part, know who they are. thank you for being in my life, for supporting me in just about everything i do, and for never giving up on me, even when i gave up on myself. i know i still have a lot to learn - but so far, it's been an amazing adventure. here's to 28 (on the 28th, no less!) - may this next year be as much fun - or more! - as the others have been.



8 minutes to my birthday. don't forget to send gifts. :-)

Love to those who listen.